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Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma Paperback – August 4, 2023

by Bob Beare PhD (Author)
4.8 4.8 out of 5 stars 115 ratings
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Do you want to let go of what’s not working and claim your authentic life?

“Dr. Bob’s book offers the practical tools to gain awareness of the ways we unconsciously remain trapped in cycles of trauma and dependency.” — Dr. Nicole LePera, #1 NY Times Best-selling author of How to Do the Work and How to Meet Yourself

Trauma is running the show and most of us don’t think we have it. We label it “stuck”, “stress”, “depression”, and “anxiety.” The solutions are simple but not easy. Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Want to Do unpacks:

1) The many forms of trauma - mild and severe,

2) The many ways we medicate our pain.

3) The importance of finding support.

4) How to do the deep inner work.

5) How to live with purpose.

6) How to live with passion.

Dr. Bob Beare’s book is a framework and a guide to emotional freedom. It provides powerful insights on how to go beyond therapy and create a meaningful and purposeful life — a reminder that, with support, we can transcend the patterns that keep us stuck!

Get this book if you are ready to let go of the crap, and live your most passionate and purposeful life.

"This book is full of experience and learned wisdom. It's a guidebook to help us find the healing energy necessary to reclaim our imaginative soul."

— James Hollis, PhD, Bestselling author of Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life and The Middle Passage

"With insightful strategies and inspiring stories, Dr. Bob Beare's groundbreaking book will help you find your way back to wholeness and healing."

— Scott Allan, Bestselling author of Do the Hard Things First

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  1. Print length
    146 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    August 4, 2023
  4. Dimensions
    5.5 x 0.33 x 8.5 inches
  5. ISBN-13
    979-8887597171
  6. See all details
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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0CDNBZ68R
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Self Publishing (August 4, 2023)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 146 pages
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 979-8887597171
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 6.7 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.33 x 8.5 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.8 4.8 out of 5 stars 115 ratings

About the author

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Bob Beare, Ph.D

Bob Beare, Ph.D

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Bob Beare, PhD is a psychologist and executive coach. He is the author of The Creative Fire: 10 Weeks to Emotional and Creative Fitness, founder of Deep Waters Recovery Experiential Workshops, Bobbeare.com Empowerment Programs, The Creative Life Institute, and is a professional actor, director, singer, and composer.

Customer reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars
4.8 out of 5
115 global ratings
From Societal Expectations to Your True Self: The Journey of Liberation and Empowerment
5 Stars
From Societal Expectations to Your True Self: The Journey of Liberation and Empowerment
Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Wanna Do is a brilliant beacon of authenticity in a world driven to conform to societal expectations.With deep insights and raw vulnerability, Dr. Bob Beare dismantles the toxic ethos of enduring needless suffering. Like a wise friend, he urges us to confront our inner conflicts, dispel societal illusions, and embrace our true selves.Through compelling anecdotes and hard-won wisdom, it unveils the path to liberation from self-imposed chains. This empowering book offers an urgent message: we can break free from inauthenticity, transform pain into growth, and rewrite our stories.A captivating guide to reclaiming life's vibrant essence.
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Top reviews from the United States

Jared L.
5.0 out of 5 stars well written and accessible
Reviewed in the United States on April 6, 2024
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A solid intro for anyone new to shame and trauma work (via Jung and Brene Brown among others) as well as insightful guide for those already familiar with the concepts. Short worksheets at the end of each chapter invite the reader to take action.
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Patrick
5.0 out of 5 stars Refreshing take on Mental Health
Reviewed in the United States on March 13, 2024
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This book recognizes the importance of counseling and treatment but also dares to point out that medicating our way out of discomfort mostly benefits the pharmaceutical industry. I enjoyed the reference to CPT Kirk from Star Trek V, “I need my pain.” Trying and failing builds character and gives us the tools to overcome challenges. Overall a great book!
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John
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must-Read for Transformative Healing and Profound Self-Discovery
Reviewed in the United States on August 26, 2023
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"Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want To Do" by Dr. Bob Beare offers a transformative journey through the author's deeply personal and thought-provoking insights into trauma and healing. With a resounding mantra of "The way out is through," Dr. Beare advocates for embracing our pain and fears, channeling them into creative outlets, and ultimately liberating ourselves from the grip of past traumas. The book's power lies in its ability to guide readers toward releasing their pain and finding renewed joy, all while emphasizing the importance of shared experiences and survivor-to-survivor learning. Dr. Beare's courage to share his own battles with addiction and healing resonates profoundly, creating a sense of trust and legitimacy that make this book an essential read for anyone seeking to navigate the path of recovery and self-discovery.

With an engaging and relatable writing style, "Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want To Do" captivates readers from the opening pages. Dr. Beare's profound wisdom shines through his natural, conversational tone, making it feel like a heart-to-heart conversation with a trusted friend. The book seamlessly blends profound realizations with practical guidance, challenging readers to embrace change while fostering empathy for their own shortcomings. This work stands as a beacon of hope, a must-read for those seeking meaningful relationships and a deeper understanding of the healing process. "Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want To Do" offers profound insights that can empower readers to break free from their past and embark on a transformative journey toward healing and growth.
One person found this helpful
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Jj
5.0 out of 5 stars Go Through The Fire To Heal
Reviewed in the United States on August 22, 2023
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There’s so much magic in Dr. Beare’s book. The work book questions after every chapter is perfection! They are uniquely posed to show how to recover and break free from any of life’s adverse tentacles. Dr. Beare is a therapeutic magician.

I can not possibly tell you in review the many lessons learned you must read it!

One nugget. Many feel that the worst thing that can occur is to be triggered by random events or when hearing others share their traumas. Dr. Beare says, “If we are in fear and can get it out on paper with intense red paint, or in a wild dance, or by writing a poem, we keep the energy moving rather than letting it build into despair. When you are going through hell, keep going!”

“The way out is through.” I endorse this 1000%!

Perhaps, it is because I went through the fire in 334 pages of We Are Not Our Secrets, my memoir. Doing what he suggests transforms. I was able to release completely. Never having to revisit that pain again, unless it’s when helping others or sharing my story.
But the tears are temporary as when watching a movie. They are most often tears of joy.

I feel as Dr. Beare so eloquently writes, “The way out is through.” Dr. Beare is a trail blazer presenting new psychology techniques that are imperative. He outlines them, not only based upon his years of research and study, but his years of fighting addiction and winning. He believes the best teachers are those who have battled and won:. Survivors learn from survivors.

Go through your fires, as Dr. Beare suggests, because it is in this you will be set free! Thank you Dr. Beare for this treasure.
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Bal
4.0 out of 5 stars What did I just read?
Reviewed in the United States on September 18, 2023
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I have to be honest, I am not the target audience for this book. The author presents a passionate/angry prose on how to let go of unresolved trauma. While some good points were made, I found writing rambled from topic to topic. One of the things that wore thin was all the quotes from psychologists (that I get), and family, movies, pop stars (that I don’t get. ‘You can’t handle the truth’ is overused and can apply to anything). The overall tone was not for me, but I admire the author’s passion.

I would recommend this book to people frustrated with unresolved trauma, or perhaps psychology students wanting a fresh perspective. Download the sample, if you can stomach/appreciate the tone of this book, then this is for you.
2 people found this helpful
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Julia Pappas
5.0 out of 5 stars A Guide To Reclaiming Your Life
Reviewed in the United States on August 30, 2023
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Dr. Beare's book invites us to have a much needed conversation with ourselves about why we get stuck in patterns of doing things we do not want to do, where these patterns are coming from, and how to free ourselves from them. Bob's wit and humor in sharing his wisdom and his own life journey makes his writing not only personable and approachable, but also highly relatable.

Written with the reader in mind, it flows like a friendly conversation. The book is also very practical with down-to-earth exercises after each chapter to help the reader reflect on how new lessons resonate with them personally. These are great to come back to any time we feel getting sucked into old patterns, behavioral compulsions, and addictive tendencies.

A much needed resource for those who want to keep growing personally and emotionally. When we let go of people-pleasing by doing sh*t we don't want to do, we can start living -- living a full life that aligns with what we do want.
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Kelly Barnes
5.0 out of 5 stars I love the focus on creativity!
Reviewed in the United States on February 1, 2024
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Dr. Beare states that depression may be related to creative deprivation. For me, this is an enlightening, new and different approach that rings so very true. This book is filled with relatable experiences, encouragement, and inspiring guidance- including a ton of support resources- along the path (back) to living an authentic and creative life. Highest recommendation!
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Top reviews from other countries

Bamber
5.0 out of 5 stars The right book at the right time
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 10, 2023
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I read this book in one day and was stunned by the insights. I can honestly say it’s one of the most resonant books I’ve read in many many years of self-exploration. Perhaps it was possibly the timing but this book hit me right between the eyes and forced me gently to open them! I’ve now started the demanding work of doing the chapter exercises. Some of you will know how the tears can flow and how hard it is and yet feels so good . This book is for you!
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Pasquale
5.0 out of 5 stars Good book
Reviewed in Italy on September 20, 2023
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This book is a powerful guide to reclaiming your authentic life. Dr. Bob Beare's book dives into the impact of trauma, our coping mechanisms, and the path to emotional freedom. With practical tools and profound insights, it offers a roadmap to break free from cycles of dependency and lead a passionate and purposeful life. If you're ready to let go of what's holding you back, this book is a must-read.
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Melissa Bell
5.0 out of 5 stars Great exploration of trauma
Reviewed in Australia on October 18, 2023
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Really loved this exploration of how trauma keeps you stuck.

On particular, I loved learning about trauma and creativity, that ‘laziness is a lack of enthusiasm’ and how to charge your creativity.
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jessica birks
5.0 out of 5 stars The slap in the face I didn't know I needed
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 18, 2023
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This book hooked me from the first sentence like it was talking about my actual life. I will be keeping this in my kindle arsenal for whenever I need a boost. It covers so much. I contacted the author personally to tell him how much I loved it.
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Betsy S
5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome book
Reviewed in Australia on September 27, 2023
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This book is well written in a friendly, easy to understand conversation. Author provides great suggestions to make better choices and with support to let go of the dependencies, heal the trauma, and enjoy a vibrant life. A great read!
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